If... The Difference.

"You are alone if you decide not to go to that kid's party, with the clowns and magicians, and children running around... You're lonely if you miss having a place like that to go.

You are alone if your family left to go to that cousin's (who you hate) wedding and you did everything to lose your invitation so that you would be free to stay home... You're lonely if after the wedding, you find the pictures on the internet and spend hours looking at them trying to find a friendly familiar face.

You are alone if you spend Saturday night on the couch 'cause your best friend went out with her new boyfriend... You're lonely if you think that you'd do anything to be with them, even though you would be ruinning their one month aniversary.

You are alone if you decide not to spend the New Year's Eve with your family and instead, be in front of the computer at midnight... You're lonely if all you can think about is that you wanted to be able to hug each and every one of them.

If is a choice you are alone, if it's destiny, sorry pall, you're lonely."

Let the Music Play

"She was going to school. Walking to the bus stop with her headphones in place. She was listening to the singer saying how much she missed someone.
The air of the morning was cold, hard to breath and left a hole inside her lungs, as if something was missing. The red, oranges and yellow leaves falling, gave a sad look to the desert street.
The girl sang along with the music.

The track changed. The singer talked about the guy that made her happy.
A thin light of sun appeared between the clouds and the wind stopped, so that it wasn't cold anymore.
The girl sang along with the music.

The bus driver was in a bad mood, so was the singer who was now coursing the guy who ruined her life. The girl stare for a second at the boy, and when he looked back, her sight went in a different direction.
The girl sang along with the music.

Hopes and dreams were fulling the girl's head, as the singer described how amazing she felt when she achieved her goal.
The bus driver said "have a nice one", and the girl smiled back walking toward the school.
It was the last year and soon she would be leaving to college. New dreams, new challenges, new life. She hoped for the best and something was telling her that the best would come.
She felt good, and once again, the girl sang along with the music."

The Jump.

"Every night she would lay in bed and think, almost in a prayer, about the dreams she had.
Even though all the signs pushed her toward the dreams, she would hold them in and just allow herself to live them at night.

If she tried to share them, people would say she was crazy and so were the dreams, and somehow she would let those people slow her down.
She even learned how to fake smiles and pretend she didn't want any of that anymore. But she knew her life was leading her to it, she could no longer hide, that was the way to change everything, to "break the deal".

She got on the plane, after a long talk with her sister, who tried for the last time to convince her not to do it, but it didn't work this time.
She looked at the city down there, with it's cars ant-sized. She took the first step. She Jumped."

A Girl Got to Dream.

"15 years old. Orphan. Living in a small city, south of Alabama.
She was seating on the wooden bench, looking at the little stage on the center of the city square, stage that held her firsts victories when she was still a little girl.
She was writing on her journal, making the list to be sure she wouldn't forget anything.
1.Work all summer.
2.Have enough money.
3.Buy tickets to New York.
4.That friends phone number.
5.A coat, a dress, some underwear...

She would get there. Find every Dream she had. Be the bigger person she wanted, bigger than that damn small town.
She would go far!

A girl gotta dream..."

-----

"Was born in Los Angeles, close to all the celebrities everybody wanted a piece.
Went to college, had her own little line of clothes, keeping mom's work going.
Never left home, she was happy that way. Life was comfortable and easy. She couldn't want more than that, could she?

At night, new places came to mind. Forests, beaches, wild animals, the sea... She was living a whole new life. In her mind...

'Cause a girl gotta dream..."

"Come and Save me."

"Every new morning was a nightmare, something to show her that she had survived another night. A bad day ahead to be lived, and she wished she could leave, get lost and never be find again.

All the yelling and the fights echoed in her head over and over as the tears were falling down her face.
She couldn't see, but she knew that things were being thrown on the room as the noises got louder.

She set on the floor by the bed, with the notebook and a pen to work a letter, wishing that someone would read it and come for her.
The same five words repeating 'till the end of the page: "Please, come and save me..."

No one never saw the letter..."

About a guy.

"There was this guy.

New in the town, new at school. No one knew where he was coming from, his history or his father's name.

She used to seat on the chair, just staring at him, wishing she could guess all his secrets and mysteries. He was the reason for her to get all dressy to go to class and to shake and burble during the politics debate.

All she knew about him was his name and his gentle way with the words. She could listen to him talking about economy as if he was singing her a lullaby. Just listening, staring...

He was her knight, the chosen one, the prince...

She knew all that because of the one hour classes, his critical words, his dirty jeans and a sarcastic smile he had everytime he made her blush and lose her thinking on the subject.

Ahhh that guy..."

Got to lose some pounds.

"There was a perfect place.
A place where boyfriends didn't cheat, kids didn't have to leave to college, nor get married or grow older than cute little babies.
A place where war didn't exist, hunger was not known and death never had to happen.

You didn't have to leave your loved one, neither they you.
Your job was wonderful, such as your boss, and you'd make enough money to pay the bills, vacations three times a year and still have a little bit to buy a gift for yourself, just to be spoiled.

You didn't have your heart broken a million times, didn't have to cry alone while writing on your diary.
Didn't have your first time ruined by a fresh, young (and fast) boy, and didn't have to fake orgasms years later (because the guy was still fresh and fast even though he wasn't young anymore). Meaningless sex was always about you.

You could eat a bag of cookies and send the fat to that bitch who stole your boyfriend.
Could just seat and watch the gym classes instead of sweating your ass off, or you wouldn't even need it, 'cuz your fat was already with that bitch from before.

You would not feel alone, you wouldn't be scare, wouldn't worry, 'cuz everything was just perfect...

-----

Then there's you, living miles away from that perfect place, with the thought of the first change you gotta make Monday morning, repeating continuously on your mind:
"I gotta lose some pounds...""

The Loneliness

"The extra pillow on the bed was decoration during the day and company at night time, something to make the bed smaller.

She was laying there, on a Saturday night, at 9:30pm, thinking about the people in this side of the world, the side where was still Saturday night, that was getting ready to go out for the long night that was coming ahead of them, while she was there already ready for nothing."

-----

"It was her birthday. She was turning 21. The celebration: going to bed at 10:00pm after watching some mexican soap opera with a lady that had passed the day yelling at her.

"21" she though, "Yay" said quietly, laying on the uncomfortable sofa, as one single tear fell..."

-----

"Four monhs had passed, she was still hanging there.
Even the new season didn't cheer her up. But she was stronger than that. She had learned how to be.

The days were paassing fast enough for her to care. Just nine other months, a Christmas here, some birthdays there, no big deal.
She was hanging there."

-----

The Loneliness...